Living in a world upside down

Perhaps a better title for this blog,would be living right side up ,in an upside down world. But hey ,whatever to get your attention :-)..the title is one that kind of grabs you, does it not ? Haven't most of us heard this song and even sang it,especially when feeling alone, isolated or abandoned.

So just what do I mean, you may ask, when I allude to the possibilities of living right side up in a world upside down ???

Perhaps it was an adrenaline brain rush, caused by a surge of caffeine ( just ask any of my family members, I do not need alcohol to get "high" just give me an occasional cup of joe,viola ' hyper- mom...Having grown up in a heaven/hell home environment . I had wonderful a mom who lived her faith and alcoholic dad who lived his "faith"as well, he also had great qualities ,but unfortunately alcohol abused &destroyed ,these. My Dad ,under the control of alcohol,for most of his life would emphatically claim , he was in absolute control,of everything. Early in my life, I decided there would not be alcohol in my future,once I was able to be on my own.

So what did the caffeine "rush" supply to my thoughts, this particular morning ?( in my crazycritter blog I refer to my thoughts as ruminations...thoughtful ponderings.... having a shepherding personality I have enjoyed observing our cows and sheep in their relaxed chewing of cud state.... :-) I'm sure they think lovely thoughts,they look so peaceful, while doing so ...

I'm Not sure what started the thoughts about the rock,and being upside down, but the song I am a rock ,I am an island came to mind.

My rock ,on this planet is my husband..( I also have an amazing out of this world rock, A ROCK of rocks, who happens to also be the rock for my analytical ,scientific hubby ) My husband ,I am always counting on the amazing mind he has, he remembers verbatim nearly everything,especially words to something...so here goes his recollections for this song, and the more he remembered,and reiterated for me, the more my musings,and thought turning s(see the word ruminating does fit rather well don't you think ?)

Here are the words he remembered..

I am a rock, I am an island

I have no need of friendship

friendship causes pain

It's laughter and it's loving ,I disdain

Don't talk of love

I've heard the words before

It's sleeping in my memory

I won't disturb the slumber

of feelings that have died

If I never loved

I never would have cried

A rock feels no pain a rock

An island never cries.....

Now for this homemaker/MOM/critter shepherd/taxidermist/artist's/coach/consultant/biz entrepreneur /Indian heritage,thus quiet observations... gone wild dissection..., that seeks to looks beyond and beneath the surface,where/what is the bottom line,where does the rubber meet the road?. ( there is a saying about how music can change the world...it's words...( so I ruminate...what is truly being "said" and about whom ?? (...ummm...who alone ,is true love,who is the one true rock?)

For what it's worth, here is my bottom line evaluation(no beating around the bush, but as granddaughter would say when approaching an "ouchie" head on... that's kinda ouchy grandma, so perhaps tenderly beating around the bush(ourselves, our beliefs,what we accept,condone,or even unconsciously allow in the very airways around us,with much love). When we have our hearts set aright, our dreams will be in clear focus ,our goals will be vibrant and distinct,we can see and taste them...we will pursue them.

Along comes what I call a glitch(more in an upcoming blog that I am currently "ruminating about. These little missiles....they cloud our vision,they will robs us of life.....help , we cry out...and console ourselves,I am a rock ,I am an island....( FYOI as the author of this blog, I maintain the right to to beat around "this" bush" while I am proclaiming that I am not, keeps you guessing or thinking aha another caffeine "buzz"....does it not?)

In my list of favorite links, is a link to a blog called in the life of a child, in this blog is a link to another blog called slurping life. Now I've not yet gone to view that blog, but the title fascinates me...Slurping life....

When our vision,our goals etc are out of focus no longer can we slurp...To me slurping is enthusiastically, richly abandonment in pure enjoyment...slurping...

Our upside down world says we are ok ,you are ok...I(ME) am ok , I (me) am a rock (really?)...I have no need for anything outside of (me) I am an island ..I (me) stand alone,defend,care for,enjoy, everything (alone)....

thus I (me) have no need of friendships and what they bring...that LOVE is untrue,fails you ,it is a lie ..

All of these are untruths to "salve" "our" conscience so we can do, live, be ,as we choose (in this instance, alone...our own island,our own fortress)

Again, bottom line from this gals thoughts... what a contradiction,ultimately this "truth" is like blasting away at the real TRUTH, the very foundation of not only who we truly are,but who we truly are designed to be...

I personally believe each of us have this inner sense we are something greater than just primal soup. Even those who deny such ,sing a different tune on their death beds...I didn't say this or make this up, it's in the history books, or biographies....

So we "are "our own rock..we have "no need "of any real outside rock...we have no need of others, let's just wall ourselves off (this is self preservation gone haywire)...if love is not true, if it fails, we can either shun the greatest gift of love ever given,deny it's existence, or look for ways to justify our own lack of need for it.

This is the truly amazing part, we have the power of choice, and here is where our various baggage's,from life's "travels", can weigh us down.. Why not take a few moments today and see what unnecessary baggage's are either weighing,slowing,or dragging you down. If after "unpacking" a bit ,looking at what we have and you choose to ,keep or nourish the contents of you luggage ,that's your choice, fine ,wonderful however keep in mind....(and I like the way Yul Brenner quoted while portraying a Pharaoh in a movie he starred in))so let it be written....so let it be done. Step up to the plate and then no crying over spilt milk (when your dreams,goals etc do not come to fruition... When unpacking my luggage, I decided I for one need to avail myself to healing, to allow myself to accept the gift that will free us. To see, to feel true love...this is just the beginning. Yes that may leave me vulnerable, but given the option to choose I want to pie al' amode, ambrosia, to SLURP life...enjoy every emerald along life's journey...(locate and enjoy a copy of the book or movie So Big..)

Here in lies the paradox, true healing doesn't happen until you get the "splinter" out...one must heal from the inside out....So I am ready to open my heart, yes I will more than likely have it hurt again, but I am free to love.. free to grow,and thus free to accept love again...If I choose to keep those "protective" barriers up I inadvertently am choosing to shut out the light for healing and growth... the same is true for whatever is our goal..healing, perhaps having friends and or family reject us,a new business venture,schooling, faith ,reaching for a heart goal everyone else ridicules you for... a good example against all odds is my husband ,who grew up as an Anglo american child migrant worker, he was ridiculed for his dream to go to college...he had much opposition,many struggles,long hours of hard work ,much sacrifice looking towards the provision and for the good of his family. After many years he finally obtained his goal,at that time even then the economy ,and life happenings"played" some dreadful "tricks" on him ,yet he persevered.

In a fortune cookie was a quote I have treasured. not that I believe in "fortunes" per say,but this one contained a Chinese proverb, I believed so true. He who aims for the moon may hit a tree, but he who aims at the tree, may never get off the ground.... funny isn't it how a story has a life of it's own and can decide to go where it chooses. As I started this particular post I had no thought of mentioning anything about family,especially my husband and especially fortune cookies...

My challenge is to take a few moments when you read this and ask, where have you aimed your "sights" what happened to your dreams, where are you headed, what changes would ,could you make...What can you do in the next week, next month to help you refocus and move towards your goal(though none go with you )Perhaps it is to exercise, to lose weight, to study for either personal or spiritual growth, perhaps it is doing something unpleasant ,you just need to get it DONE so you can move forward,maybe it's start or finish a fun project that has been "lost" due to life happenings....whatever, make a decision NOW to take that first step, then hold yourself accountable,even if you really are alone.and have to write this down. Perhaps consider your need to FIRE your CEO (the one who is running you) and "hire" the "one" who will help you be the best you can be...have a "staff" evaluation. Look at who,what,etc you are , let go of the one who is hindering you and GO for it... why not join me and slurp life richly fully and vibrantly.... and everyday look for and let life be emeralds..

To quote a fellow health coach/friend ...yeah baby....... he says this often and so enthusiastically I just wish I could have a clip right now listen and to help you start your journey so YEAH BABY.......(give yourself a "gold star" for a day well done....(from me).....go.. .go..go....... as I declared in my first blog , I have faith in you