I love Christmas,
One might wonder why,because
as a child besides the gifts and wonder ,it also brought enough pain to nearly overshadowed the joy of Christmas.
I vowed to myself it and other things would be different for my kids.
I didn't know,then, how much grown up "stuff" could get in the way.
Work,pain,interpersonal relationships,family adjustments , personal "growing up"struggles , financial "grief" (out of work ,no money),disappointments( deeds and words from others seemingly bent on destroying any joy you have, in even simple things..words sure can cause deep wounds can't they?)
Then there are the ghosts (memories) of Christmas past( I grew up in a heaven/hell home environment. My mom loved and served God, my Dad was at war with God .
Dad both loved and hated Christmas (and Christians,even his own kids) sadly my dad 'celebrated" it with way too much alcohol.
Dad ,most often ,was a violent abusive drunk.
Like water seeping into a"wounded" boat hull , these "ghosts" can sink and destroy you ,if you don't keep bailing , make temporary repairs or do like I did, and get a whole "new" boat(below)
MAN overboard...that's how one can feel during what should be the most joyous time of the year...forgetting that even the Angels sang for the birth of Jesus.
If you feel overloaded,pressurized,depressed,scroogie (hey ,all the pressure of commercialization alone, to 'get" us to buy,shop,give ,donate,can overwhelm one if you let it)
Then there is the prep time: cleaning (why did our kids and now our dogs get sick AFTER,a newly cleaned carpet?) cooking, wrapping, stuffing, decorating( just finding the stashed "stuff"to decorate,can be frustrating)
I remember one year when our kids were still in grade school, I was headed towards a
KISS Christmas( otherwise called: keep it simple stupid, or perhaps STOP the "insanity". a KISS approach to anything ,if you're not careful can quickly be like throwing the baby out with the bath water, before you know it ,at Christmas time ,you become what else... scroogie..
Better watch out scroogie I "am " headed your way.
I was tired, plus I was in the "gopher" stage (you know this stage I bet)
either your kids or your friends are involved in this program, that play etc and who is the main "go-for it" and do for them? You got it, MOM or good friend... YOU...
That year it was ME.. as I was desperately trying to be the Christmas"hostess twinkie" mom in her "spare" time" .
( the Hostess twinkie mom ,does it all perfectly ,everyone smiles and adores her.
A good movie example ,depicting...we are all "happy",working together...find and watch lilies of the field starring Sydney Poitier )
There I was TaDa: the greatest twinkie mom failure ,or so it seemed to me at the time,nothing was going perfectly, just where were those smiles? and it felt as if every one didn't adore me.
I was discouraged ,especially with all of the to do's, the expectations( both a good share of which happened to be my own): our kids wish lists were long and money was L-O-N-G "gone"
Plus I was overwhelmed with all of the commercials squeezed between the Christmas specials the family loves to watch . M-O-O-M.."hey I WANT that" or "guess what schoolmate so and so " is getting or already "got"...UGH!
Something happened, in the twinkling of an eye...no not a "quiet" in the house mouse, umm was "it"an accident?
No, it was a simple holiday movie starring Jimmy Stuart that "happened" to come on .
The movie ,It's a wonderful life, inspired me at a time I was struggling with great pains, emotionally and physically.
I felt as if my life really didn't matter,(little do we know, right? )
Next happening to clinch the "deal".. a ladies Christmas tea ...
yep, one more "go-for""thing & place . I could barely drag myself there,
I debated on not going.
I am so glad I went. The visiting missionary shared how they celebrated Jesus's
birthday BIG time...they went all out,because our God is special.
Then I remembered WHY I loved and celebrated Christmas .
I am ever so thankful for someone so special and wonderful who came into my life ,year earlier, with a precious gift:
At nine years of age I met Him, Jesus . I wanted to live for Him because He died for me.
I remembered ,Jesus had paid a humongous price for the worlds first Christmas GIFT,
a King's ransom, in fact.
But He gave His own life, not just for the world , perhaps more importantly I remembered this expensive gift was "just"for ME too.
(to really receive a gift one must accept,"open" and use it,by the way)
I accepted this rich gift of John 3:16 and "opened" my gift (Romans 10:9&10).
I also chose to follow in Jesus's footsteps as well as other heros who chose to do so :
Ruth, Ester, David, Joshua and Caleb (Joshua 24:15, is one of my life 'threads") .
Even as a young girl I chose then, come what may, I would follow.
Sometimes I felt like I was eating those heart words, but thankfully was reminded ,when I need reminded most, I am in THE race and on the Winning TEAM , with a host of "folk" cheering me on.
They are there, even when I stumble ,trip , fall or even during those times I have been "shoved" down into a pit (on purpose by someone who hates me. I am in good company though,because he hates God and especially Jesus too) .
Nearly all of my hero's are listed in what is fondly called by those who know about it,the "hall of fame: (Read Hebrews 11 in a King James or new King James version of the Bible for the most accurate translation)
Christmas is also now my time to reflect and my time to think about the coming New Year..
what would I do differently,what did I miss, forget, wish I could do over.. I start getting my "list" ready for my New Years appraisal and revision.
Thus ,I am keeping my list and checking it twice, not just for Christmas but for each coming
New year too.
You "got" this post today because...as I was checking my list for what I need to do and make during the remaining days before Christmas.. what do you know ,an elderly dog I am babysitting, while the owner is away for Christmas, just became incontinent..did I "need" that?
This dog is so sweet , and he was very embarrassed so I "simply" added to my to do list.
I chose to take the time and take him with me to "visit" our wonderful vet, and design and make him a doggie diaper. NOW he feels better and I can ,with Joy, get back to my list.
To compensate for the time 'crunch" this extra to do created on my list, I'll cross off a few things that really don't matter.
A few of those those extra "hostess twinkie" mom 'things' .
I love this dog ,even though he isn't mine ,and he needed my help.
I am remembering ..the perfect gift is love , love gives where it is needed.
Stop , look and listen... where is love really needed around you?
Your loved ones, the neighbor, the helpless, the lonely, perhaps the hungry birds outside, or a sad, embarrassed faithful ,man best friend ,even if his heart belongs to someone else.
(another great movie to watch is the gift of Love starring Marie Osmond)
May you enjoy a very special and blessed Christmas.
No comments:
Post a Comment